I used to think, it seems like I have traits of autism but I’m not disabled, I’m gifted. It feels embarrassing to admit, in retrospect, that I ever thought that was even the point.

I’ve got a lot of brain space devoted to self-censorship. I’ve spent the last five years carefully studying these mental blocks, and demolishing the flimsier ones.

I may be able to cope with a lot of trauma but the inevitable, undeniable truth is that I suffer, and it’s the suffering that defines my life whether I admit it to myself or not.

I suspect the true distinction is that I have had, at several key moments in my life, environments in which I thrived, and it was those formative experiences that positioned me as gifted rather than disabled. Maybe those experiences just happened to assemble into a coping strategy.

Final thought: Valuing yourself isn’t the same as thinking yourself superior. It’s apportioning yourself at least the bare minimum of happiness.